On Love and True Discernment

 By: Rebekah Hargraves

Photo Courtesy of: Alex Shute

“And I pray this: that your love will keep on growing in knowledge and every kind of discernment,” ~Philippians‬ ‭1:9

I joined a new small group at church a couple years back, and we went through a Bible study on the book of Philippians. As I was reading through the 4 chapters of Philippians, the following verse in chapter 1 stopped me dead in my tracks and has remained with me ever since:

“And I pray this: that your love will keep on growing in knowledge and every kind of discernment,” ~Philippians‬ ‭1:9‬

Did you catch that? Paul’s heartfelt desire is for our *love* to grow as our knowledge and discernment are also growing.

This really stood out to me, because as we have likely all repeatedly seen on social media over the past few years especially, the most common occurrence is that as someone’s supposed level of knowledge and discernment grow, so, too, does their level of snark, arrogance, and sarcasm. Rather than growing ever softer, more tender, more humble, and more loving towards others as we grow in our knowledge and ability to discern, oftentimes we see the exact opposite thing happening.

But Paul is showing us here that, though this may be common, it is nevertheless not the way of Christ. 

This is why we see him urging two women in Philippi just a few chapters later to “agree in the Lord.”

Paul makes it clear throughout his epistles that the Lord desires unity in His church, a unity that stems from discernment as to what is important and what is not, what is a core doctrine and what is a secondary doctrine, and the knowledge that love covers all and is to inspire every word we speak, action we take, and thought we entertain.

Friend, if you think yourself to be growing in knowledge and discernment, but at the same time find your disdain also growing for people who are different from you in some way, I would venture to say you are not truly growing in thoroughly Christian discernment. 

For “the wisdom from above is first pure, then peace-loving, gentle, compliant, full of mercy and good fruits, unwavering, without pretense.” ~James 3:17

May we seek to go out and live this way ourselves, dear sisters.

Reflection Questions:

1) Have you been led to believe, perhaps through the influence of popular "discernment ministries", that to be truly discerning means that you are given permission to look disdainfully down on others? 

2) How do these passages we looked at today reframe your understanding of discernment and what it looks like?

3) How can you purpose to have your life be characterized by true discernment and wisdom that is from above?