Foolish Arguments

By: Jenifer Metzger

Don’t answer the foolish arguments of fools,

    or you will become as foolish as they are.

Proverbs 26:4 NLT

Proverbs 26:4 tells us to not answer foolish arguments, otherwise we become just as foolish. Pretty straight forward instruction. Yet, read the very next verse...

Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools,

or they will become wise in their own estimation.

Proverbs 26:5 NLT

Wait, what? Verse 4 says to not answer foolish arguments, but verse 5 says to be sure to answer foolish arguments. We know the Bible never contradicts itself, so why do we have two verses that say seemingly the opposite thing?

It comes down to the individual situation. There are times when we should walk away and avoid the foolish argument, accusations, and comments. The "fool" doesn't want to hear reason, doesn't want someone to share their side, and doesn't care about truth, growth, or wisdom. So engaging with them will only make things worse.

Yet, there are times when we need address the argument, the accusations, and the comments. Times when the foolishness needs to be brought to light and the truth needs to ring out. But how do we know which way to go? When someone is trying to argue with us, when they've made false accusations or half truths, or when the comments from others continue to roll on, how do we know if we should walk away or answer?

First, and most importantly, pray. Ask God for guidance. Second, it is also good to seek wise, unbiased counsel. And third, think about the situation. Does what they are saying really make a difference? Is it truly hurting you or anyone else to a point that it will be a detriment?

I will share two real life scenarios to show the difference.

Someone shared with me that they were going to do something that went completely against God. It was so horrific and immoral. It directly affect my family and I knew would affect this person eventually. Staying silent was not an option. I had to use the instruction from Proverbs 26:5 and let the foolishness be brought to light and let truth ring out.

Someone told me they knew something about me. The way it was worded was basically that there was something awful going on in my life and I lied. I was lost because I had no clue what they were referring to. There wasn't anything awful going on and I hadn't lied to anyone. At first, I wanted to know what it was they were talking about. I wanted to get to the bottom of this. But after some prayer and careful thought, I decided this was the circumstance to let go. I knew there was nothing going on and I knew I hadn't lied about anything, so I knew the person was either misinformed, had a half truth, or was just fishing for some kind of information. Engaging would have been worthless, so I used the instruction from Proverbs 26:4 and didn't answer.

We will be faced with foolish arguments. Read that again. We will be faced with foolish arguments. We will have people try to argue needlessly with us, we will be accused of things, and people will make comments about us. It will happen. We need to pray, seek wise counsel, and truly think before we engage. Don't let yourself get trapped in foolish arguments, don't let yourself getting taken down the path of foolish ways. When you can, walk away. When it needs to be addressed, do so in a way that will bring glory to God.

Discussion:
1. Thinking of my two scenarios, has anything like these situations happened to you? What did you do?
2. Are you facing a foolish argument right now? Is it the Proverbs 26:4 kind or the Proverbs 26:5 kind?