From a Recovering Perfectionist

 By: Lauren Thomas 

My name is Lauren. And I’m a recovering perfectionist.

 

Do you struggle with perfectionism? Here are some “symptoms” of perfectionism: 

• You also struggle with procrastination (because if it can’t be perfect, you put off doing it).
• You have a strong inner critic and are critical of others.
• You seek approval from others.
• Feedback makes you defensive.
• You have a strong fear of failure.
• You have extremely high standards for everything and everyone
• You feel guilty about not meeting your standards or making your goals, etc. 

If that list made you feel uncomfortable, me too. Wanting to be perfect doesn’t seem like such a bad thing. But that list is not a ringing endorsement for perfectionism. And the irony is that none of those things create perfection! 

 

We could unpack this. Process where perfectionism started for us, what voices in our lives contributed to it. We could look at how the Enemy uses this as a tool against us. But none of that will ultimately undo our struggle with perfectionism. 

 

Instead, we need to realize that we don’t need to be perfect. And we aren’t the one responsible for our perfection. It’s not our job. It’s Jesus’s job. And it is the joy that was set before him.

 

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, ² looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

Hebrews 12:1-2 ESV (emphases mine)

 

Jesus - the only perfect human ever – is the one who perfects us! It’s not our job! The pressure is off! When we grasp this truth, we can take a deep breath and let it go. The weight is lifted!

 

When we can recognize that we will never be made perfect by our own striving, we can begin to grasp the truth that Jesus is the only one who can perfect us. By placing our faith continually and faithfully in Him, we receive His righteousness before God. 

 

And to the one who does not work but believes in him who justifies the ungodly, his faith is counted as righteousness,

Romans 4:5 ESV

 

So let me ask you this: why have you been working so hard? Put your faith in Jesus and let Him be the one to perfect you. He’ll do a better job than you ever could, I promise. Coming from a fellow recovering perfectionist, isn’t that a relief?

 

Reflection:

What “symptoms of perfectionism” do you identify with?

How does your perspective shift when you realize Jesus is the perfecter? And that you are merely required to have faith in Him? How does this change things?