Last Sunday night, our seventh grandchild was born-a sweet little granddaughter. This week I've been staying with our youngest daughter to help with the newest grandbaby as well as our twenty month old grandson, the proud big brother. My cup is running over with the blessing and joy of being a "nana" to seven grandchildren, ages six days to fifteen years old. But, unless you know me and my family well, you probably don't know that there were years of heartache and hope deferred before we saw this desire fulfilled.
My oldest daughter and her husband lived through the grief and pain of infertility and loss for over a decade before they had their first miracle, a baby girl, followed by another little miracle, another little girl, three years later. Watching my daughter go through the hope of getting pregnant, then the loss of miscarriage time after time, and year after year of hope deferred was almost unbearable.
Not many years after they were married, our second born daughter and her husband adopted siblings, a little girl and a little boy. What joy they brought, and still bring, to our whole family. But, unknown to us, our daughter, who had never conceived, had a secret desire to have another baby. What a joyful surprise it was to all of us, including our granddaughter and grandson, when my daughter conceived for the first time in thirteen years of marriage and had a little boy, who will soon be five years old.
Our youngest daughter didn't struggle with infertility, she struggled with wanting to be married and not meeting, "the right guy". She had her heart broken a few times through the years, and by the time she was in her thirties, she decided to accept that she had a pretty good life and that, perhaps, she was to remain single. About that same time, our oldest daughter and son-in-law planted a new church. On the opening Sunday, a young man came to their church and continued to come. Some time later, our youngest daughter moved back into the area from the midwest to help in their church, met this young man, and eventually married him. Well, you know the rest of the story from my opening paragraph.
Why am I rehearsing my family's story to you? It's because I still remember the pain of hope deferred. I still remember questioning God. I still remember struggling to believe in His goodness when I would see the pain in my daughters' eyes and their hopes and dreams crushed. What I didn't know then was that the joy of of desire fulfilled is so much sweeter after the long bitterness of hope deferred. So now, when hope is deferred, when there are desires and longings and requests that I've been praying about for years, I look around me and see the sweetness of desire fulfilled. I remember and I keep on praying and believing.
Elizabeth, your story has inspired me to continue to pray for my middle son and his wife as they struggle with infertility. They are both getting to the age when it will be impossible for them to conceive. I had almost given up, but now will continue to ask God to bless them with a child.
ReplyDeleteI will pray with you!
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